Advent Week 4: Learning to Love...and Hate?
1:46b "My soul magnifies the Lord,
1:47 and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior,
1:48 for he has looked with favor on the lowliness of his servant. Surely, from now on all generations will call me blessed;
1:49 for the Mighty One has done great things for me, and holy is his name.
1:50 His mercy is for those who fear him from generation to generation.
1:51 He has shown strength with his arm; he has scattered the proud in the thoughts of their hearts.
1:52 He has brought down the powerful from their thrones, and lifted up the lowly;
1:53 he has filled the hungry with good things, and sent the rich away empty.
1:54 He has helped his servant Israel, in remembrance of his mercy,
1:55 according to the promise he made to our ancestors, to Abraham and to his descendants forever." -Luke 1:46b-55
The theology I was exposed to as a child, connected love and violence. In other words, God loved humanity so much that “he” sent “his” son to die a horrifically violent death, in order to save us from our sins. Moreover, God loved us so much, that God would send us to hell for not believing in x,y,z.
But when it was pointed out that condemning people to a lifetime of eternal damnation, seemed more abusive than loving, I was told that, God’s “justice” and love were entwined. God loved us enough to give us free will. So even though we are essentially coerced and threatened to believe certain things and behave in specific ways, we technically can still choose to disobey God. I mean, we’d then suffer a lifetime of horrific burning, but still, it’s a choice that we as individuals make.
Not surprisingly, more liberal and progressive Christians reject this understanding of love. However, in an attempt to separate themselves completely from the conservative Christian distorted view of love, too many liberal and progressive Christians have turned love into nothing more than a sentimental, feel-good, don’t make waves-emotion.
While conservative Christians tie their definition of love to a horrific form of violence and punishment (which they claim is a form of accountability), more liberal and progressive white Christians tie love to a cheap form of forgiveness. You know, the type of forgiveness that I’ve seen progressive and liberal white people demand most often from Black and brown people: one that focuses on white people's well-meaning intentions but ignores the actual harm they caused. (This forgiveness also tends to be one-sided. Something white people demand, but don’t give).
In both warped understandings of love, hate is dismissed or ignored. White conservative Christians will recoil in disgust at the critiques of their theology as hateful. They insist their theology is based on love. In their skewed worldview, this is what is hateful: queer people advocating to be treated as humans, people demanding reproductive rights for all, pointing out that other religious beliefs are valid, and explaining how interconnected white supremacy and American Christianity are.
Liberal and progressive Christians will insist that hate has no place in their understanding of love. In fact, their definition of love is in reaction to the hatred of conservative Christian theology. What progressive and liberal Christians don’t understand is that the weak, sentimental love, they advocate, that often centers on white feelings and the status quo is in fact an expression of hate. Sure, it’s not an angry or in-your-face type of hope, but it lets those from marginalized groups know they don’t matter. And that is a form of hate. But here’s some things that they consider to be “hateful”: holding racists accountable for their actions, because it’s not “nice,” pointing out that impact matters more than intention, and explaining that their wishy, washy sentimental version of Christianity is no less racist than that of their white conservative peers.
The forms of hatred embodied in the theology of some white conservative and liberal/progressive Christians is abhorrent and needs to be corrected, but is there room for hatred at all when discussing faith, God, and love? Actually yes. I believe there is a place for hatred within Christian understandings of love that doesn’t rely on imagining God as a divine child abuser nor depicts love as weak and sentimental. Hate can be talked about openly and expressed and not contradict divine commandments to love.
How? By focusing hatred on institutions of violence rather than on individuals, even individuals who participate in said institutions of violence. Now, you can advocate for holding said institutions responsible for their participation in these oppressive institutions, without advocating for hating them. For instance, I believe one can hate the institution of law enforcement and how injustice and racism is embedded into its very foundations, while not dehumanizing individual police officers.
Hate and love can go together. And hate isn’t something to be feared, rather directed towards unjust institutions and away from individuals. Mary, mother of Jesus/God, exemplifies this type of love-one where hate and love co-exist. She exemplifies, in Luke 1:45b-55 a fierce love that calls out injustice and demands something new and better.
In the midst of preparing to bring new life into the world, Mary demonstrates a love directed not only towards her and the new life being born, or towards God, but a love that encompasses all. She presents a love that challenges the oppressive status quo. She is not condemning any individual to an eternity of physical torment, but neither is she afraid to call for an end to the oppressive status quo. She is speaking of a God that has a deep hatred of oppression and who in love, desires a better world. She calls for the overthrow of oppressive forces. Certainly, those in power would hear those words as hateful, and yet those words contain a deep love.
As Christians, we don’t need to embrace a love of wrath and violence, but neither do we need to embrace a love that is content to be quiet and embrace the status quo. Both understandings of love are distortions and direct hate towards individuals and towards the marginalized. Instead, we can embrace a fierce love that HATES injustice and oppression while loving individuals, especially the oppressed.
