Day 17: Spending Time with God

Jan 30, 2020

#RethinkChurch is doing a 22-day journey for self-reflection based on John Wesley’s 22 questions. I am composing short blog posts addressing each question. I am using these posts to encourage Christians, especially Progressive and Mainline Christians to reflect deeply on what it means to be Church in a world marred by oppression and violence.

Day 17: How do I spend my spare time?

Growing up as a Fundamentalist Christian, I was encouraged to spend as much time as possible with God. That, in and of itself, was not a bad thing. The problem was that spending time with God was presented as a chore. Spend time with God or risk an eternity in hell or, at the very least, your life going of the rails. Not only that, but there were expectations about how we spent our time with God. Going to church was not enough, we needed to make sure we attended a church that was preaching “the truth.” Mainline Churches were viewed as nothing more than social clubs filled with apostates or people only masquerading as Christians.

We were expected to attend the numerous services/Bible studies held during the week, unless we had an excuse such as work, sickness, or school work. Again, not a big deal. Me, being a nerd, for the most part, enjoyed going to the various services. Even today, I love going to Sunday School and services on Sunday, and attending chapel on Tuesdays. If I weren’t swamped with school work, I would probably find a way to attend even more services.

The problem was that again, attending church was viewed as a requirement to ensure that our eternal souls would be spared hell. And if you were unable to attend services for an extended period, (unless you had a really, really good excuse) it was assumed that you had “fallen” and your relationship with God was suspect. If you attended the wrong type of church, your devotion to God was called into question.

Obviously, we were allowed to spend our spare time doing other things (as long as they weren’t against the rules). We could hang out with friends (but not at the movies, clubs, etc.). We could have fun. But if we didn’t spend “enough time” with God, whatever that meant, our faith was questioned.

There’s a similar sentiment amongst some Mainliners towards those who do not attend church. Now most won’t say that skipping church will send someone to hell, but they question that person’s spiritual life. They will judge the person as “selfish” and too individualistic. They blame those who refuse to enter through the church doors instead of recognizing the large amount of selfishness within the church: the backbiting, the racism, the sexism.

They also ignore the fact that many people work on Sundays. People do not necessarily have the luxury to take off work for a few hours to attend a service that may not even be relevant to their lives. Once again: spending time with God and in community is presented as a chore that one has to do.

It has taken me years to realize that spending time with God is not only life giving, but doesn’t need to fit certain parameters. I, personally love spending time in church. I’ve found a church that I love attending and will miss when I graduate. I love attending the chapel services at Brite Divinity School.

But I also know that not everyone finds church to be a safe space. If I move into certain parts of the deep south, it might be difficult for me to find a congregation that isn’t hours away, where I feel welcomed as a bisexual woman.

Some people cannot attend services because of work or a chronic illness. There are plenty of complicated reasons why people do not attend church. But that doesn’t mean they don’t have a relationship with God.

As I have grown older, I have discovered God when I’m outside in nature, when I am talking with friends about theology, when I am laughing with friends about…well anything. I have felt God’s presence via the nightly reflections hosted by Bri-Anne from Resistance Church. I find God in the online service that Resistance Church occasionally holds.

Some people experience God’s presence through their art, whatever form it may take and believe that the very act of creating art is a way for them to spend time with God. Others, because of work or illness spend time with God by whispering short prayers as they try to navigate their hectic life. For others, just relaxing is a way to spend time with God.

In other words, spending time with God doesn’t need to be chore that takes only specific forms. When you believe in an expansive, limitless God, spending time with God can take place anywhere and in any form.