My Tears Ricochet: A Question of Perspective
Fifth in my Taylor Swift and theology Folklore series.
Samuel said to Saul, “You have done foolishly; you have not kept the commandment of the Lord your God, which he commanded you. The Lord would have established your kingdom over Israel forever, 14 but now your kingdom will not continue; the Lord has sought out a man after his own heart; and the Lord has appointed him to be ruler over his people, because you have not kept what the Lord commanded you.” 1st Samuel 13: 13-14
Even on my worst day
Did I deserve, babe
All the hell you gave me?
'Cause I loved you
I swear I loved you
'Til my dying day- Taylor Swift, My Tears Ricochet
Historically, we don’t actually know much about the reign of King Saul. Our main understanding of his reign is from the Biblical text, which overwhelming paints him in a negative light. There are some good characteristics the text highlights: Saul is handsome and he does defeat the enemies of Israel a few times. And yet, from the beginning, his reign is doomed to fail.
In 1 Samuel 8, the people of Israel demand a King. The prophet Samuel tries to persuade the people to give up their request warning them that God can and will give them a King if they ask for it-but the king will bring them heartache and pain. However, despite Samuel’s dire warnings, the short reign of King Saul begins with promise. Saul is a strong and mighty warrior that vanquishes the enemy of Israel. Finally, the people think. They have a protector. A king that will ensure that the people are safe.
Unfortunately, Saul has a number of character flaws that make it difficult to be a good leader. Saul is impulsive and will do what he thinks is best. When commanded to wait for Samuel to arrive and conduct a sacrifice to God, Saul becomes impatient and takes on the role of priest and conducts the sacrifice himself. Saul also refuses to follow through on God’s commands to completely destroy an enemy instead deciding to keep the spoils, though he claims it is because he wants to sacrifice the best animals to God.
Saul’s inability to listen leads to God withdrawing his presence from Saul and bestowing it on David. At first, Saul doesn’t seem aware that David is now God’s chosen one. In fact, Saul, who becomes tormented by “an evil spirit” after God’s presence departs from him, at first finds comfort and strength in David’s lyre playing. The text states that Saul begins to love David. Of course, those feelings of love quickly go away, replaced by anger and jealously when it becomes clear that David is now receiving the blessings that had originally belonged to Saul.
The Biblical text portrays David as in the right, subject to Saul’s jealous fits of rage and numerous attempts to kill him. And yet, even after numerous attempts on his life, David refuses to kill Saul. And when, in 2nd Samuel 1, a young man claims credit for killing Saul (though 1st Samuel 31 claims Saul died by suicide) and Jonathan, Saul’s son and David’s close friend, David, in anger, has the young man killed and he sings the praises not only of his best friend Jonathan but also of Saul.
David is overwhelmingly presented in the text as a pious, holy, person who recognizes Saul as God’s anointed one despite Saul’s horrible actions. Saul, however, is unquestionably the villain of the story.
But what if, the stories recounted in 1st Samuel don’t represent the full picture of King Saul’s reign? After all, we only know what the authors wanted us to know and they were decidedly pro-King David and anti-King Saul. But how would the stories recounted in 1st Samuel be different if they were written from a pro-king Saul viewpoint? What would a letter, written right before King Saul’s death, where he tries to salvage his legacy look like?
I imagine the letter reads a little like Taylor Swift’s song, “My Tears Ricochet.” Now I know that sounds ridiculous but hear me out. In the song, Taylor Swift takes swipe at the idea that she is the villain. She didn’t deserve to be treated badly by her unnamed partner. She doesn’t deserve to be villainized while her partner goes on living as the harmed hero. Yet she knows that memories of her and their time together will haunt her ex.
In a similar way, I can imagine King Saul, on the eve before his death gathering his thoughts. He knows that those who win and outlive their enemies are the ones who get to shape history. So, he sits down to write. But instead of writing a letter of sadness and repentance, he writes words of defiance. It wasn’t he who was wrong, but it was those closest to him. His son betrays him to help David. Samuel anoints him as God’s chosen and then revokes the anointing, claiming he is following God’s orders.
And of course, David, the usurper, claiming to be sent by God to take Saul’s place. Yet Saul saw right though David’s attempts to take control. Saul loved David. Saul had given him a prominent place within his administration. But David wanted power and control. And David has the audacity to pretend to be the victim. While Saul was only protecting what was his. Saul would recognize on the night before his death that he was finished. He would no longer remain in power and David would not only gain control but be able to shape the narrative of what occurred.
History would remember David as the innocent one and Saul, the unrepentant, cruel, selfish ruler. It is game over for King Saul. But Saul makes a promise. He will haunt David for the rest of his days. His memory will be a curse, bringing nothing but pain and sorrow to David. David will hide behind his acts of heroism, but the truth will eventually be brought to light. The world will see what type of person he is.
King Saul’s story, from his perspective and those of his allies, are lost to history. We are left with a one-sided view of who he was. And since he was in a position of power, it is very likely that he was cruel and corrupt. But still the question begs to be asked, how would the story of David and Saul have differed, if told from King Saul’s point of view? What parts of the truth are missing because we only get a Pro-David side of the story?
Reinterpreting Biblical stories, especially in light of a Taylor Swift song, seems silly. And obviously, my interpretation cannot and should not take the place of Biblical canon or the interpretations of scholars and religious leaders. But what if Saul wasn’t the villain as often interpreted by Christian readers? What if we questioned those who are portrayed as heroes and villains? What lessons might we learn?
